Just Like My Mom...Only Better!

From our Saturday Visit

Finally! A week were no one was sick or tossing cookies away in the toilet or getting their noggin stapled back together! Geez I was really starting to worry my gang was literally falling apart!

We had sometime to spend with each other and to spend with friends. The big girls were out of school on Friday. Saturday was busy busy and Sunday was lazy lazy. Just the way we need it sometimes :)

Thursday we were supposed to meet some friends at Disneyland to celebrate Grayce's staple removal that afternoon. For some very Hollywood reasons they were going to be unable to make it. Although I hadn't told the girls yet I had my heart set and my plans made to go after the doctors visit! That's just what I did...making Thursday quite a full day for this mama. The Handsome Pilot was laughing at me by the time I went to sleep/went into full body and mind failure just like the Sunday previously.

 A not so quick journey.... Thursday morning I was up with the roosters getting dressed and ready to see my adoring fans who awaited Ms. Starr's reading of One Fish Two Fish at the Green Eggs and Ham breakfast for Dr. Seuss's birthday celebration. Followed by a round of reading various books to various classrooms school wide. Interrupted by a plan to go pick up a nice piece of wooden furniture for the baby's new playroom. Back to the school to help clean up (a little) and to enjoy the 8th grade improvised play of The Cat In The Hat. Then off to the doctor...

NOW A SMALL INTERJECTION of how much I do NOT enjoy the girls doctor. We have seen him a few times now and he is just not a fit for us. He is a young doctor and full of one line of opinions. He will probably not stay in pediatrics seeing as though I am not the only parent that feels this way. I will blog more on this experience later! Anyhow he was not in the office that day and we got the pleasure of seeing another doctor at the office. Grayce really enjoyed him, more importantly he seemed to actually like kids and connected with me as a parent.

Then we left the office certain she was fine and that she had lost none of her smarts after the head injury fiasco of NEMO 2012! Headed home made snacks to take with us...seeing as though I was the one that ate my way through DL the first time through. Got some lunch. Packed our bags headed out. The beauties&I rolled into The Happiest Place On Earth 4 deep! WITHOUT A STROLLER. WITHOUT A DADDY. WITHOUT STAPLES. WITHOUT FEAR.

Tearing Into a Turkey Leg...lol

A few times I was offered a ride switch pass. Which if you don't know it is what they give out to people there with kiddos that can't ride. This pass allows one parent to sit with the child that can't ride...THEN they can go on the ride without waiting in the long line. I respectfully declined seeing as though there was no one for me to switch with. BUT a few of those happy Disney workers were persistent...after I expressed that I was the only parent there I got a response of 'YOUR BRAVE'!

HUH? I am not 'brave' I am their MOTHER!

Now we don't have much of a problem on 90% of the rides because they have few height restrictions. On one ride Grayce rode in the plane behind me with a nice Mom who got outed of her own kids plane because she wanted to ride with her cousins. So it all worked out :) Other than that the girls really wanted to go on the Star Tours ride. I didn't know what that entailed so we hopped in line to find out. Baby was too small and after a 30 minute wait I wasn't going to not let them go...thank goodness I did...apparently it is AH-AH-AHHHH-MAZING! The ride is a simulator that takes you on a 3D voyage through Star Wars planets and such. The beauties enjoyed it while baby and I waited so impatiently on the other side with other kiddos not tall enough. Through out the day I got some 'Your Crazy'...'Ohh I'm Sorry'... and a pretty overwhelming number of GASPS. Don't get me started on the 'where's your stroller?' because that is a blog of a different color. I may be crazy. You may be sorry. Yes, I am breathtaking. But really people...you all never imagined I was alone because I was so calmly enjoying myself with my THREE beauties. Laughing, dancing, and chasing Pinocchio. I only TOLD you the scenario because you were inquiring about my vacation while we stood in line together and you felt the need to talk to me while your kid narrowly escaped staples in the head.

I am uncertain if I am lucky to be their mother or if me being a good mother is the cause of such perfection in my girls. I won't say that they never melt down. They do. I won't say that they have never been rude. They have. I won't say being a mother is easy. It is not. I WILL say I am a good one. I am. I can't say though that I am a perfect one. I am NOT. I wouldn't even say anyone else is a bad one. You aren't. We merely catch glimpses into one anothers time as parents. I do try to avoid attempts in judging the parent of a melting down kiddo, Lord knows that has been me before.

What I will say is that their Dad and I knew what kind of children we wanted before they were born. With time patience and the practice of three we slowly figured out how to get our children to handle any given situation that may come up.

Grayce 6mos

Mostly, we wanted happy, healthy, and secure children.  To be independent while still knowing they could depend on us. Wanting to allow them to be children with all the fun and wild that comes with it, but we wanted to be able to take them into public. We didn't want to give up our dinners out, fishing trips, camping, travel, pick up and go, stay home and keep it low...ya know our 'lifestyle'! We wanted those things. So we raised our children in a way we could do all of that. Grayce first went fishing with us when she was 2 months old! AJ was sitting in college classes with me the day after we got out of the hospital from her birth! Dru and I climbed a waterfall in Oregon (600+ feet up) about 9 days after she was born! I have taken road trips alone with them. Daddy has done so as well...nearly all the way across the country. We are blessed with children that 'go with the flow' because they are confident that they have parents that will tend to their every need along the way. I guess it helps we have never forgotten them anywhere--I am looking at you Grandma 'Stones' (The Garage Sale Fiasco of 1982). Hope I haven't spoken to soon...better do a head count before I go to bed!

Most simply put... 

We wanted children like us, but better.

We wanted to be parents like our own, but better.

Granted we have slowed down a bit with the addition of each child...but the girls weren't the main cause of that. Our careers are in a full swing upwards and it makes for a really busy time. Two of them are in school so it makes it harder to just pick up and go. BUT man oh man when it is GO TIME we hit it head on!

Camping Summer 2007

I must admit there was a panic when the Handsome Pilot and I separated for some time and I was a true single mom. A small period of time we stayed very close to home. Not at home...but never too far! I was not sure how I would handle a meltdown from AJ, boredom whining from Grayce and breastfeeding an infant all at the same time! A vision in my head of running topless through Hollywood trying to catch a screaming kindergartener and an emotional 7 year old while forgetting where I set down the baby had crossed my mind. Sounds crazy, but HEY with 3 girls at very different ages of development and temperaments you never know! I give AJ the most credit in the transistion. Up until Dru she was the baby...she was breastfeed longer than Grayce. AJ demanded more attention than Grayce (even true today). AJ was at home with me longer. Just overall Ava Jo was a very different experience than all the laid back that Grayce was and still is. AJ demanded to be held...demanded to sleep with me. Even still sleeps with her sister. Thinking back on her now it was like she was born a middle child. Sometimes she can challenge me to no ends, but the way she loves and needs love is so genuine. I have caught slack for 'spoiling her' from other people. I let that get to me a few times and tried to adjust the way I parented because of that idea. In the end it just didn't feel natural...AJ needs what AJ needs. Attending to those needs has made her more and more confident, secure, and yes...INDEPENDENT! Makes me wish I could take back all that time I tried to force that independence on her. Why would her needy attitude bother someone else? Why would I let that it did bother me? I don't know the answer to either one of those questions. I do in fact know that neither one of those bothered me for long and has helped me with all 3 of the beauties today.

Living and learning I know now is the key to being a better parent.

Besides people I didn't go to Disneyland ALONE...I was there with THREE girls. My crew. My gang. My family. My TEAM! We rolled in 4 deep...we took your parents rolling around strollers with melting down kids and made them look like chumps! As the park closed we rolled out hand in hand...baby in the sling still awake and clingy to the Meme Mouse from the previous trip. We were all a little tired, yet not melted away. We were all happy at the short lines for rides. We were all ready to see Daddy. WE WERE ALL IN A GREAT MOOD!

Sleepy Dru

Oh and don't think it was because I bought them a million things or bribed them with prizes for good behavior. WE DIDN'T SPEND A DIME! AJ came close to one bout of tears. Grayce and I talked her off that calmly and easily. I didn't lecture once. I didn't lose anyone. Mostly, I didn't think anything of it at first. I only think about going 'alone' now because it was mentioned so many times through the day. Their daddy didn't really think much of it either. For me or for himself. I only said I couldn't see him wanting to do it because he would have to skip some of his favorite rides...not because he couldn't handle the kids. Our parents survived us. We certainly will survive these three.

My mother taught me to be unafraid when it came to motherhood. She told me as long as those babies are coming first then everything else will make sense. So between their daddy and me everything is making sense. His mother didn't let kiddos slow her down...she was active and always on the go with kids right next to her. His father traveled with them a lot never questioning if he should be doing that alone. My parents were so young they had such few choices but to tote me and my bro around everywhere. My Mama K often wrangled five of us at a time PLUS our cousins, I can not recall a time that being with ALL of us stressed her out. With all of that watching and learning from our parents we grew into the kind of active parents that they were. Trust me this little story in comparison to what my own parents and my in-laws did with us will make me look like the chump!

What are we doing better than our parents? Probably nothing at all. But we are still their kids...which makes us more right than them! HA

I am in forever debt to our parents for raising us well and always supportive in the raising of ours. I know a parents job is never done. For that I am thankful because my heart breaks a little to think that my beauties would ever not need us to guide them. Even if the guidance comes from a childhood of memories. Watch and learn baby girls. One day you are gonna have to do generations of good parenting...only better!

Photographic Memories

I used to be a woman who welcomed change and adventure. Not saying that I no longer do...but more these days I am a little slower to warm up to change and adventure has a entirely new meaning. With all certainty it has been the addition of each beauty that has made me this way. Once you have a full house of little ones it is important to have routine and schedule of day to day activities, but somehow you lose all sense of organization! So strange how that works out.

Around our home has been a busy time getting settled in...to a new place and a new schedule! New routes to school, new obstacles out the door, new rules, so many things are new new new!


Yet there are MANY things that remain the same in HollyHome! Kids everywhere thrive on knowing what to expect (unless it involves ice cream or Disney anything). Keeping the little ones in a solid routine great reduces fits, attitude and confusion. In return making happier and healthier children (so said the girls first pediatrician). Taking that advice and applying it has helped me tremendously as a mother. Bed time got easier, potty training was a breeze, dinner time went smoothly and all around makes us happy. The handsome pilot and I have found these tools to be beneficial in our lifestyle. We relocate for work. We both have ever changing work schedules. We can be known to change directions with a shift in weather just while driving to dinner. We confidently know that our children will easily adapt because the core of what we do and who we are as a family does not change.


Recently I have seen how these intangible gifts of routine are even ever changing...we can introduce new routines and new traditions without a huge disruption in the girls lives. WELL ALMOST! Some changes are out of our control and we do not give up our efforts of healing the uneasy parts of life.

In prayer lies the core of our routine. Every night and every meal we say prayer. I have mentioned this before in previous posts and when I say EVERY I mean MOST. There have been some spans of time where our routine was so fast paced at bed time that 'prayer' was a God bless you said on the way to the bedroom. Followed by me sneaking in later to make the sign of the cross on their foreheads whispering to them each individual prayers that I wrote after G was born. Other nights we just all pass out watching a movie or having the Sing It Karaoke Championships. The through line is that we don't forget God at bed time or meal time no matter how busy we get and no matter what has changed around us in life. Sometimes it's me saying prayer...sometimes it's Daddy...sometimes Tim. On lucky enough summer nights Grandma G is with them and it is a collection of songs to include 'Amazing Grace'...and that is her special gift to them. They love it and look forward to every visit because of that special time.

After our recent move it has been more important than ever to stick to our beloved bed time routine, as extra assurance that this is home! We also added in a little Shel Silverstein back into the routine, which dates all the way back to the days each of them was brought home from the hospital.

A few nights ago as I put the beauties to bed to say prayer they all decided that they would be sleeping in the same bed. Dru in her chosen spot crunched up tightly in the middle of her big sisters. All three pillow pets squeezed in a straight line across the top of the twin bed. Two empty beds stripped of stuffed animals and beloved blankets. One mommy moved to tears at the sight of three beautiful faces with eyes closed gently, hands clasped so God could hear them, and gentle whispers of The Lord's Prayer filling the room. I would give anything for a photograph of that moment! Any thought I had of moving them to their own beds after drifting off to sleep were removed and for the first time since we moved I felt completely and sincerely at HOME once again!

Sometimes I get so wrapped up in taking photos of events and fun times that I lose track of the TIME I am having. I forget to be involved in those moments. Don't get me wrong...I took a hiatus from extreme attachment to my camera for that reason...I know it's important to have those photographs. I sometimes wish I had more photographs, but there are so many moments that I am lucky enough to always close my eyes and go back to immediately. Having moments like that make life worth living.

Our family has finally found a rhythm again. We all know what is going to happen. How long it takes to drive to school. Which days we need to pack an extra snack for the car. Most importantly we have learned that while the world CAN and WILL change around us, we will remain the same. I am proud that we as parents never took the word FAMILY lightly. The Lord knows that with separation and time our family could have lost full sight of what we built our home on from the beginning...LOVE and FAITH. Coming back together again has in no way been easy, but it has not been a challenge either. When we feel out of touch...not at home...scared of the unknown future...we turn to prayer knowing that it will take us back to HOME where we feel safe and grateful for all we have been blessed to have and know as a family.

For us it's prayer. For Grandma G it's songs. For my Daddy it was morning talks. With Mama K it is coffee and chatter over the table. I am amazed what providing consistency can do for children and for a whole family. Being consistent and having a routine does not mean that things never change, it simply means take some things remain with you as it does and if you don't like what has changed then CHANGE IT BACK to the way it were!

Audree 2010

Grayce and AJ 2007

**To my beauties I would say... Enjoy every moment you are given in this lifetime. Take photographs of the great moments. Always remember to be a part of the amazing moments. Know your family has faith in all that you choose to do and be. Most of all say your Prayers and brush your teeth before you go to sleep...it's the fastest way back 'home' again! --All my love Mommy

A rare photo of bedtime with Grandma G during a visit 'home' in 2010.

I Am Still Writing That Book...Everyday!

SATURDAY, JANUARY 28, 2006

My mom

This is my first offical blog post EVER! Its not going so well...I keep erasing and starting over! I don't know where to begin. I mean I am 26 years old, but I have lead a crazy life...and if you don't know what I have been through it is hard to understand why I get all amped up over little shit! I am a former Marine (1997-2000) which means I graduated high school and ran straight to the Corps traveled the world and came home again...sorta. Never actually moved back in with my mother since I left September 7th, 1997. I remember a few tears that night in the hotel...my recruiter told me to stop my crying and get some rest...from then on I didn't really look back. I look back now, but when I left there wasn't much to look back on. Mom and I didn't get along...we lived in a new house that I didn't grow up in...the only thing I hated was looking into my baby sisters face and hoping she understood that I loved her and I wish I was going to be there to grow up with her. Now when I look back at the same scene I see the tears my mother held back...the fear on her face...and the pain of letting me go. I wish I could go back and hug her one more time before I walked out that door. I called my mom a while back and told her thank you for putting up with me all those years and said I was sorry for not getting on the school bus on time for the entirety of my education. But what I will tell her someday is I am sorry that I insisted on learning my own lessons on my own terms. I took the hard road despite the many times she guided to "easy street". Now I know why...now I get it! Seeing my girls do it their own way on their own terms and watching thier heart break and their trust mistreated by others is going to kill me. But I am better for my experiences no matter what the struggle or disapproval from my mom...better because she was always there watching over me. Just like I will be with Grayce & Ava.

Guess I am amped up on my mom today because she had a hard day in a series of many hard days...and I can't fix it. But through her tough day she took 100 calls from me about wedding stuff and nonsense stuff and just calmed me. She really is coming through for me with wedding planning...dispite her worries over not having a job. (*note to self...kick the ass of some guy named Doug with an itch...lol!) I can say this about my mom she knows how to agravate ya but she knows even better how to love ya!

Anyhow I don't know the real point of talking this much about my mom to everybody. But I feel better. Hope you all think a little more of your own moms. Next posting I will tell more of myself so you can all get to know me better. I always said I wanted to write a book of my life, but never knew where to begin. Maybe when I bring you all up to date and hash out the things I have been through I can piece it all together and make sense of the tornando that sucked me up and spit me out...cuz so far that is what life feels like. Maybe my story will come together for even me.
<End of my 1st Blog!>

Photo From 2011 :)
-My mother inspires me more and more everyday since 2006. She is strong and genuine. She cares and love (too much sometimes)! I adore her and I am even more thankful for her love and support now in 2012 than I ever thought I could be...


The World Is Yours.